Tony Quinn's 90's "Dare to be free" EDUCO "Cult" Manifesto
DARE TO BE FREE
Do you ever feel that you really want to break out and be free, that in some way the real you is trapped inside and rarely, if ever, sees the light of day?
Do you know that there are so many things you could do, so many places to go, and people to see, yet life seems to be passing you by, Deep down you knew you are capable of achieving a much better life whether it is getting that better job, new apartment or house, finding the right person, making the relationship you are in really work ~ in short, succeeding like you hoped you would. Maybe you are just displeased with yourself and life knowing that there is so much more yet not sure what to do. It all boils down to so many ideas and ideals which are somehow not really being realised.
All joking around it can seem that most people are in the same boat except for a fortunate few, The purpose of this article to show you a way out, to encourage you and to help you towards the possibilities, the ultimate you. What we are actually talking about here are two words you have bandied about a lot and they are 'Self-Realisation’.
YOUR CIVIL WAR
The one reason that we are not able to act in such a manner as to bring about our true motives is that we cannot clearly and really see what we want or if we manage ?? so we don't seem to be strong enough to bring it about. We must be acutely clear on this, so let me give you a few examples. A standard one i always use is: A person wants to lose weight for varying reasons but they don't - quite manage to succeed. They will lose weight for a time only to put it back on again. This is very puzzling and frustrating. The reason for this is the percentage of the person that wants to lose weight — that is, a certain amount of each person wants to lose weight and for any other reason — it could be enjoying, comfort, security, habit, we could also use the word addiction — another ??? of the person wants to eat either quantities of food or certain types of fattening foods. This leaves the person in a civil war situation where they will swing backwards and forwards continuously. So we can see that there is not enough of the person available to make a final and absolute ruling to bring about a conclusive result.
A further example would be to someone with an inferiority complex and a part of them of course wants to have confidence. They will read all the books and they will force themselves to do certain things which they hope will result in confidence. But again if the larger part of them feels inferior then they will ultimately have to either resign themselves to having an inferiority complex or swing backwards and forward in a Jekyll and Hyde manner which is most disconcerting to themselves and to those around them.
Think now of all the things that you want to do and ask yourself what percentage of you really wants to do them? It is not unlike the alcoholic/smoker who everybody knows really does want to quit and is very genuine about it but want. After all, how many New Year’s resolutions ~ or any resolutions for that matter — do you keep? The most frustrating part of this is that you will see people who seem to succeed at whatever the: and you know in your heart of hearts they are not nearly as good as you This is undoubtedly true if only could get yourself together because is what it amounts to — to all go in direction. The crux of the matter therefore is that you can actually find you're not doing the things you want to do doing and embracing the things that don’t want to do. Within yourself may know exactly what you want. So succeed, that Self has to be much stronger and more powerful to overcome the civil war and to rule unopposed.
THE CAUSE
The root cause of the problem goes back to when we were born. In psychology it is popular to say that babies have only two fears — fear of loud noises and fear of falling down. This may well be true but | think they have a far greater fear, that is of the cold. The baby’s main motivating factors are towards ??? and away from cold.
Babies in the main are very adventurous, they want to get into everything. They are fearless and as they grow older they are constantly investigating and exploring. They would get into a fire if you let them, climb up an your electric cooker, get out the window or crawl onto a main road. In this way most babies are naturally outgoing and adventurous. So one of the first things they experience is when they hear the parents say "Don't", "Oh no", "Stop", "That is bad" and, as they grow older, this r?? progress from verbal admonishment, physical and mental punishments.
The baby rapidly discovers that the parents want then the ???d is a warm, secure place where it is cared for, nurtured, cooed at. on the other hand, if it doesn’t do what the parents want then the world becomes a cold, hostile place. As a child gets older it may be ???p into its room, deprived of meals, ???ed and meet with the mental disapproval and pressure of the parents.
?? is is the first division that occurs ??een the direction that the child is to go in and the direction that the ??ts see as best. So the child learns ("be good”) to follow what it discovers the most pleasant route for achieving ??th. The real lesson it is learning is to follow its natural inclinations.
THE PATTERN
As the child gets older it goes to school and again experiences the same lesson — to do what the teachers want, and even the more dominant members of the class, results in a warm, safe, secure ???d, In religious knowledge classes the child may learn that in some ways if is initially bad and therefore must follow ???n rules and regulations as laid down by religion and even God, In a sense, we ???? say this is the one exception to the ??? because ultimately if the child does not do what God wants its world will ???ne extremely warm ~ but not of ???e in the pleasant way that it has ???ne used to!
Again this pattern is continued in adult life. For instance, when you get a job you ???? to yourself that the best way to ??nce i to do what the ???s/union/majority want. Even in our ???iations with the opposite sex we ???hat there are certain things required. ???sure there always have been but in the present day and age more so.
Certainly, in the main, the approach is ???e the other person an exaggerated ???e of how nice we are, telling the ??? person what we know they want to ??? and being very careful not to rock the boat. The very real danger is that ultimately we can trap ourselves into a way relationship which is not us at all, then ?? married and repent at leisure. The sign of the facade crumbling is when we hear the words, “I didn’t know you were like that’.
Only recently in America there was some publicity given to a case of possible sexual harassment and it caused ??? people to say that they were going ??? careful in the extreme in their associations with those of the apposite sex. conjunction with all of this there may seem to be many other restrictions that for instance our grandparents didn’t face — everything from double yellow lines, income tax, AIDS, to petty restrictions like “Don’t fish here’, ‘Don’t bath here’, At a course | was attending in America one of the students who happened to be a lawyer was entertaining the class by assuring them, with examples, how it would actually be possible to arrest and jail just about anybody that you wished because we could all be breaking so many laws, both old and new, of which we weren't even aware. The class seemed to be viewing this with a mixture of hilarity and fear.
Again only lately it has been suggested in this country that maybe everyone should be given a number which they would have from the moment they were born till the time they would die and in any transaction at all they would use this number. There are versions of this of course all over the world, particularly in jails.
WHAT WE CAN LEARN FROM ALL THIS
Meet the average individual and you will find someone who is confused about their own identity, lacking in self-confidence (it’s hard to have confidence in someone you don’t know}, self-knowledge and self-fulfilment while actually being afraid to succeed. Why? Because you would have to step out from the crowd, go after what you want. Remember you have been programmed to believe this is wrong and that the world will suddenly become a cold and hostile place.
Even if you do succeed you may not enjoy it because of guilt. Is this why in Ireland if you succeed people will say. “They must have done something wrong or dishonest’? Maybe this is why we have the reputation of a nation of begrudgers where our talent feels it has to go abroad to make it ~ for unhindered Self-expression.
EDUCO
Many times we have heard of people going in search of themselves or we have heard the saying ‘Know thyself’, Indeed, I am fond of saying that the purpose of life is to give birth to your Self while the art of living far me would be to know, experience and express my Self. Yet, for most people, they lost their Self at the beginning and that is the problem. So it is not surprising then to find many people who are goalless, unhappy and with no real purpose in life.
If you are a reader of my material you know that I have given a name to the search for Self. I call I EDUCO — a word from which the word ‘educate' comes, It means to draw out from within, to call forth what is dormant, hi?? unexpressed. This is really what the purpose of true education should be — Realisation.
I have put forward the premise that there is a basic person inside us all who can be uncovered. As I understand ??? child is very close to being its Self but as we have just seen, it is quickly and thoroughly programmed into doing what society in its many forms wants until it loses its Identity and its way literally becoming cannon fodder for society - we are both the product and the caus?? society.
In the process of all this programming we lose the capacity to think for and i??? our Selves. As I understand it true ed??tion should return people to being Self-motivated rather than a herd-like, sheep-like attitude. We all know what happens to sheep — they are exploited for their wool and ultimately killed.
My main interest in life is to be wi?? call a pioneer of human potential. I ??? the whole movement of education ??? society as being one of away from ??? rather than towards Self-Realisation. Therefore any ‘free-thinker’ who has measure of Self to think from real ?? that the future of mankind depends on helping people towards true Self-expression.
All problems both personal and g?? have their roof cause in the fact that we have lost touch with our Self. For what person becomes truly programmed ??? become robotic and all the beauty and sensitivity of Self/our Spirit is lost. I can see the extreme examples of this in some of the recent wars, including particularly the Second World War where whole nations can literally lose their capacity to feel for another and then programmed in the most horrific and destructive ways. Programmed People are always deadened people who ultimately bring about death.
THE SOLUTION
Naturally we cant' go back to ba??hood and start all over again but if ??? would like to discover the Self you n?? knew, or maybe had glimpses of who you were a child, or perhaps even n?? then we have to start exactly where we find ourselves. On understanding Educo which means to draw from within, then, based on that, the information I am offering you in this article is ??? to act almost like a thread so that ??? each inside yourself and find that ??? of Self and you start to draw it out ??? hope that it will become a rope and ??? a path on which your Self can ??? ge into the world. This is really the ??ate adventure and challenge where ?? become a pioneer of human potential ??? where you haven't gone before — ?? if you are successful im your quest ??oly where no one has gone before.
I have said you have to start where you are and by that { mean you have to ???ss whatever measure of Self you ???nd and that is the thread you begin to pull on. To succeed you must some??? instinctively appreciate the value of ??? Self and therefore be prepared for the rest of your life t0 make the following suggestions part of your approach to ??g. The approach is this: To absolutely so far as possible (and you will have to continually expand the boundaries of ??? express your truth. Speak it, live it, ???. Be true to your Self.
??? us see this in action. If you begin ???thing yourself in your everyday activities you will notice that In what you really think and, in contrast, what you ??? what you really want to do and what ??? actually do, what you really want ??? what you actually achieve etc. There is always a division between the two ???gs. In everything that we do there is ??? division. You must work to end that division. Say what you really feel, act on your feelings, act before you think. You have to free your Self from that mental strait-jacket.
Ask yourself this question, ‘Is there ??body alive that you have ever told the absolute truth (what you believe to be the truth) to?” Most people may say, ‘I tell my husband or wife, boyfriend, girlfriend everything’. Is that really true? For instance, if you told your best friend exactly what you thought of them, now exactly without any punches being pulled, and the same to your husband or your wife, your boss etc. what would happen? Come on now — really what would happen? The truth is that you believe they would soon be your ex’s.
For instance, could you honestly say that you have never told a lie ever? Could you confidently say to the child, ‘l always tell the truth’? It is vital to understand that if you don’t speak the truth as we know it you end up by not knowing that it’s just not practical to go round telling the truth’, | hear you say. Bear with me and we will find out. Would you be willing to give this approach a fair trial?
YOUR INNER CORE
Begin by getting yourself a good notebook or a year diary would be excellent — many of us I am sure will have gotten presents of these. Now start by picking any subject that you like but I want you to do this with quite a few subjects — taboo subjects are excellent, those that you normally wouldn’t have the courage to talk about — sex, for instance, is a great example, Write down exactly what you would like to do sexually. Even when you come to parts where you say to yourself, ‘Oh no, I couldn’t pull that down’ put it down, draw out that thread.
You will begin to discover all sorts of things about yourself. Keep going even if you come to parts where you say, ‘Oh, that is not nice’ — in other words if you appear to discover things that you don’t like about yourself. As you keep on pulling on that thread and it becomes a rope } assure you that your very inner core a8 a person is perfect so don’t be afraid to delve into yourself. Ultimately you will like what you find.
When you have done that move on to another area such as what you would really like to do in life. Forget about your responsibilities, restrictions, limitations, just put down exactly what you would Tike to achieve in life. Don’t worry about it sounding selfish. You are getting to know your Self. Ruthlessly put down what you really want to do — at least be free here — the effort to get to know your Self will be so worthwhile.
Pick other subjects — what you really want for your children, or the type of relationship you want, or why you are really not happy etc. Think of it as going to school, for this is the most important learning you will ever do — learning to listen to your Self. Most of the people I meet are in need of healing no doctor in the world could cure for they themselves hold the secret, self-healing being the remedy.
A TRUE FRIEND
Our next step then is to find a person who you can truly talk to, Unfortunately this may not be someone to whom you are intimately related. It can be but if may not be because you may feel that you can’t tell them the truth. How many people say “I find it easier to talk to strangers at a bus stop’? If this is the truth then you are trapping your Self in an unhappy world but the real truth is that you can be the author of your wor?? set out boldly to find a true friend. You may have to force yourself to say how you really feel. Maybe you can with another person who read this article which would be ideal and practice together. it could be so worthwhile.
Maybe you could consider sitting down with your child or children, individually that is, and encouraging them to tell you exactly how they really, really feel. { promise you that you will be doing wonders fog them. Maybe, just possibly, you are one of those rare people who could allow your loved one, your husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend to really confide in you. Of course some people will say, “Yes they can’ and as soon as that person says something that we don’t like we freeze up and we immediately shut them out — maybe for days after which they have to endure further recriminations. Eventually for peace's sake they will agree that we are ??? while swearing to themselves never tell us the truth again.
If you want to get to know them you will have to be much more mature ??? this. You will have to allow them tc ??? you the troth. Otherwise you don’t ??? anything at all between you, really ??? just a lot of lies. Indeed just imagine what would happen to a person whom everyone decided just to go a??? with, letting them think that they were always right. The fact is that they will get further and further out of touch with reality because each of us in an ??? relationship keeps ourselves in balance by using others as sounding board for our personality.
Ask yourself now how many people you know to whom it is impossible to tell the truth? They are people without friends, who have lost all balance, others just go along with for peace ??? quiet keeping their own counsel to themselves. Such people are isolated, alone, impossible to reach, sadly even pr??? themselves on their ideas. It is vital to your happiness, even your survival that you allow and encourage other people to communicate freely with you.
Going back to the isolated people you know that if you told them what you really thought it would result in hysteria and would become their mortal enemy. These people become so volatile because one ever tells them the truth. The?? hearing anything even approaching the truth, they become hysterical and aggressive and fly off the handle. Sadly, their nearest and dearest have done people a great disservice. The vio?? with which they reject the truth is a measure of their isolation. Possibly you van reach them by asking them to read this article first of all and then ??raging them to practice with you. ??? can refer to the article as a third ??? or a referee.
If you really love that other person and it is possible for you to provide that ??? friendly atmosphere in which the ??? can prow. Think of the Self as a ??? child which if we are nasty to is ??ar to what we have already said ???t the hot and the cold. If you go out ?? the cold and it is freezing cold you buckle down into your coat. You shrink ??? from the cold and you may even appear as if in fright. But when you come to a friendly atmosphere like your best friend, which I sincerely hope you have, ??? it will be Hke the sun shining on ???. You will take off all your layers of clothing. You are willing to be naked ???re that sun and stretch out and bask.
That is the atmosphere if you want to be a real person that you must be able to be for some others, including your ???? Self. Many times I think ‘Is there no one in the whole world who is more ???ble to us than we are to our Self - always criticising, running down and ?? on ???ing ourselves?” So maybe one ??e first steps is to be our own best friend.
WORK WONDERS
Let me assure you that if you begin ???ng this approach with people as I do ??? can actually cure people of illnesses, ??ession, inferiority, failure etc. Just encouraging them to relax with you, take off their coat and tell the with, in other ??ds, be themselves, will work wonders
Be assured, particularly with loved ??, that they will say things that you ?? don't want to hear. Don't be frightened by this. As they continue to express themselves and that very frail thread ??s to become the path on which they emerge you will find and discover that ??? Self is always wonderful and good. I ??st to people that there is a basic person which can be uncovered in us all and ??? basic person is wonderful. You will be delighted to discover that the apparent ??? is always on the surface and when you dig you will ultimately come to the ???d which will allow you to love yourself and the other in a totally different way. So please give your Self a chance.
??a your other daily activities with people attempt al all times to be as truthful as you can. For instance, even (and you have to use the word ‘even’) in the way you make money be truthful. i you offer people a service (it could be anything) then give that service physically, mentally, socially and spiritually. Of course the ultimate service is to give of your Self to others.
By this [ mean, for instance, that many people might claim that they are TEEN, a health studio but it really is a front for *Get them in, get them out, get their money’. Yet this is not what's up over the door or in their ads. You know the type of thing T mean where you go into a boutique and the first thing you try on you are told, ‘It looks lovely, my dear’, as they try to keep a straight face. So put your energy into giving the service you are purporting to give.
Of course you might say, ‘l am not working for myself, I am working for a boss and I don’t like them so why should Ido a good job?” Here I must point out to you that when you say that you are not working for yourself you are right, but you should be working for your Self because you have to grow that Self. That is your purpose in life. You are not short-changing the boss you are short-changing your Self and ultimately the quality of life that you could have had.
For that matter that way of doing business or working is a very dishonest way and that is a huge division in you and you will never be happy when that is your approach to life, That is what I am pointing out throughout this article. You have to heal those huge divisions in your Self, you must become one — just one Self going in one direction. That is Self-expression.
Be very clear that talking to people honestly docs not mean insulting them over some real or imagined grudge that you may have. Bear in mind that the more one-directional you become {as opposed to bits of you going in all different directions} where you are really talking to a person, really doing your job, really having sex, really nurturing your child, then, in that area you have true Self-expression. In so doing you will take living to its ultimate by becoming a Self-educated person. That is your purpose for being in this world. Start immediately, be true to your Self and begin to discover how truly wonderful you are.
DR. TONY QUINN (Doctor of Clinical Hypnotherapy)
DARE TO BE FREE
- The Ultimate You.
- Civil War.
- What percentage of you wants to succeed?
- Cause: the split as babies/school/work/relationship/God=loss of contact with Self.
- Afraid to go forward
- Educo.
- To draw out the Self: Tell the Truth; end the division.
- Help others to tell the truth.
- By telling the truth you come to a one-directional point — you come to the Self.
- Be true to your Self
Sourced from Dialogue Ireland